A day at the beach

Manhattan Beach is pretty!

Being a California girl, who lives in Central California, only hours away from anywhere I could ever want to go, I pretty much just stayed in Fresno. During a cart-ride around the back lot with one of the ladies in my office, I listened to her tell me how she was going to Yosemite to just get creative inspiration for work and I realized that last time I was in Yosemite was when I was 8, when I lived in Bakersfield!! For crying out loud, if you live in Fresno, go to Yosemite!!! It is a disservice to yourself if you live so close and don't go!

This actually illustrates a larger lesson I have been in the process of learning as I have moved. If you want to do something, do it! Don't just plan obtusely to go out to lunch with someone; the "Oh yea, we should do lunch or coffee sometime." If you want to do it, then do it! Specifically, I wanted to just sit and chat with my friend Laura and I always had it in the back of my mind that one day I should plan it. Well low and behold I move! No more lunch. If someone is important to you, tell them! If time with your friends and family is important to you, then spend it with them. I always thought that if someone wasn't calling me, and I had wanted to call them, my internal monologue went something like this: "Oh, well, they must be busy with their own life, otherwise they would call me if they were free." And there it went, I sat at home and watched TV, spent hours at the gym, what-have-you. What is most important in life are the people in it. The ones who you do, or want to, share your life with. So go, do, share!

So as I start this new chapter, I will take this lesson from the old, and correct my passed missteps. I started today, waking up in my lonely, deserted town-home and I decided to go to the gym. As I got back I couldn't help but break down in tears. How did I go from on top of the world, being surrounded by love and support to coming "home" to an empty room with no one to go meet. So, I called Juan. As a recent mover himself, he has finally acclimated to living alone. That is not to say he enjoys it, but has finally gotten used to it. (Now, you may be thinking, I thought she said she lived with a lady. And that is true, I live in a lady's room in her town home, but I haven't seen her in days due to our difference in schedule.) Juan reassured me that I can do this, I am a mature adult, I am independent, I have a good head on my shoulders, etc. And sure, those traits allow me to be responsible and capable of living away from everyone I know, but those don't make my heart play any happier a tune right now. So I cried. Juan even sent me a bible quote that I sent him when he moved Psalms 46:1-3

After I cried, I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "You can fix this. You go out there and you spend time with the other interns. You are the only one to make the next step. So do it right. You can either stay in your room all day and cry, or you can go out there and do this right!" So I got ready and went to Manhattan Beach with Tu and Kelly, two other Disney interns. We had a good time in the sun on the beach, getting ice cream, walking the shops and I finally got some sushi (and beer)!

Goodness! Such an experience it's been! I love it. I owe my family and friends and a huge thanks for all their love, support and encouragement! I can do this knowing you are all rooting me on! Thanks. Love you all!!! And good night!

Feeling lonely, but feeling better

Hello All

So I have neglected you this weekend. I'm sorry.

My first week at my new position has been AWESOME!!! These guys who are the principle graphic designers at WDI are incredibly talented, knowledgeable, NICE, encouraging and totally understanding that my degree was focused on Print design not Environmental design.

For my graphic designers: this job is incredible! Where else can you design for turn-of-the-century late 1800s, early 1900s store fronts, Princesses, Frontier western-style, and for the Tomorrow that never happened? The range of style, design, materials, scope, media and creative influence is so broad that this position will always keep you on your toes. Besides the fast turn-around, the ability of seeing your designs come through execution and be visible by thousands of guests a day is an aspect that is totally unique of being in my specific off-site campus of WDI. When it comes to our creative endeavors: "If you can dream it, you can do it."- Walt Disney

As for my life. Today was harder. I left work feeling a little empty. I guess I could sugar coat my entire experience here for you all, or I can really give it to you straight and have you be thankful of my honesty. I'm lonely. Though I have a great woman I shared a living space with, and I have a wonderful team of coworkers and interns near me. I miss my friends. I want to go to Nicole's and enjoy her new place. I want to go home and talk with Matt. I want to be able to drive only two and a half hours to surprise Juan! I want to not be experiencing this part of my life alone. Now, I know I'm not alone. I can call you all whenever I need. But... it is something else entirely when I can chat with Jodi in the back room for hours face to face than to sit on the phone. I want ice cream with Rakis! I want to go to spin class with my mom!

I digress.

I am still happy. I did just get a gym membership at a 24hr Fitness with my Disney Discount! Yay! I'm excited to get back into the gym. This moving has taken me out of the gym.

One great note to leave off on, and then hopefully future posts will sound less like a letter home and more like a blog post, I had a great (short) conversation with one of the principle designers. As it started, he asked me how my first week had been. Timidly, I replied, "Great." And with a sideways glance he asked, "Really?" I toured the Glendale office last week and was overcome with intimidation. These artists, engineers and Imagineers have an unbelievable talent, execution and creative "sight" that I fear I just don't have. My coworker understood and sympathized. He had once felt the same. He laid it out simply, "You have to look at where you are in your career, and where we are." He described a professional and creative development that takes years or experience to get to this point. I am fresh out of college, and there is no school that caters to this job description. He, and it sounds like the whole team, knows and understands that this is new for me, I am not expected to perform at their level. Whew! Now all I have to tell the perfectionist working hard within me, that I will learn and grow here, I don't have to be perfect...yet!